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(English below)

Om en måned er min barsel forbi og jeg skal tilbage på arbejde. Tidspunket er stille og roligt rykket nærmere, og pludselig er AM så stor, at hun skal være hjemme hos sin skønne far i en periode inden vuggestuen kalder.

Jeg har det meget ambivalent med at skulle tilbage på arbejde. Jeg glæder mig, for jeg kan godt lide mit arbejde, mine kollegaer og mine opgaver – og ikke mindst det at skulle bruge min faglighed. Men jeg ved også, at jeg kommer til at savne hende den mindste – rigtig meget.

Man skulle tro, at jeg vidste, at det ville komme, men denne barsel har været anderledes end de to andre. Jeg ved, at AM er mit sidste barn og samtidig har jeg kæmpet så hårdt for at få amning og andet til at fungere – hvilket det har gjort – og nu skal jeg pludselig sige “det var så det”… det føles mærkeligt.

Så dagene går med at være nær AM og nyde den sidste lille barselsboble inden hverdagen vender tilbage.

me and am

In a month, I’ll return to work after my leave. The date has been steadily getting closer, and suddenly AM is a big girl ready to be taken care of by her lovely father for some time before daycare beckons. 

I feel very conflicted about going back to work. I am looking forward to it, as I really like my work, my co-workers, my tasks and to be able to use my academic skills again. But I also know that I’ll miss my little girl a lot.

It might look like I know the drill, but this leave has been different than the other two. I know that AM is my last child and I have fought to have the experience I wished for with breastfeeding and other challenges – and I have been lucky enough to have what I dreamt of – but now I suddenly have to say “that’s it”… it feels strange.

So these last days are spent quietly enjoying this final experience of being on parental leave.

 

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Godt – om end lidt sent – nytår! Jeg håber, I alle fejrede det på præcis den måde, I ønskede det!

Den første tid i januar er for mig altid en tid, hvor jeg ser tilbage og tænker over det forgangne år, og 2018 var et vildt år for mig – med op og ned, skygger og sol.

Jeg ved, at jeg mest vil forbinde året med forøgelsen af familien – med vores lille frøken AM, men det var også året, hvor MM fyldte 10 (!), og hvor LB startede i skole og skulle forlade børnehavens tryghed. De store ryk i familien har ikke været uden bekymringer og udfordringer, det har været hårdt og til tider barskt, men året sluttede et bedre sted end jeg af og til turde håbe på.

Det var året, hvor jeg skiftede job tilbage til pensionsbranchen og til at arbejde med en skøn og fantastisk mængde data. Selvom jeg lidt frygter slutningen på barselstiden (det er utroligt, som jeg næsten er vokset sammen med min lille babypige), så glæder jeg mig også til en hverdag og arbejde igen.

Best wishes for the New Year – however late they may be! I hope you all celebrated in exactly the way you wished.

For me, the first part of January is always a time for retrospection, for looking back on the past year and thinking of what has happened and what I have experienced and learned. And oh my, 2018 was a wild year for me – with ups and downs, sunshine and shadow.

I know that I will forever remember 2018 as the year that brought AM into our family, but it was also the year where MM turned 10, where LB began in school and left the sanctuary of kindergarten. The big shifts in our family have not been without worries and challenges, bit has been hard and often rough, but the year ended in a better place for us all than I sometimes dared hope for.

It was a year where I changed job (again) back to a pension firm and to working with large quantities of wonderful data. Even though I fear the end of my maternity leave (it is staggering to realize how I have grown a symbiosis with my little girl), I also look forward to the regular days with work.

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Jeg har strikket babyting og store sweatre, sokker og sjaler. Min favoritting er klart min Falla sweater, som jeg har brugt ganske flittigt siden den blev færdig.

Designmæssigt har det også været et ganske glimrende år – på trods af graviditetstræthed og barselshormoner har jeg selvudgivet 5 designs – haft et design på forsiden af Bladet Garn – og klarede også 4 designs for Filcolana.

I tog godt imod både Perlesøstre og Eiri Baby, og jeg kan se, at af de lidt ældre opskrifter er Six’es tæppet stadig populær hele året (det er også et godt resteprojekt).

I have knit a lot of baby items, some big sweaters, socks and shawls. My favorite knit is my Falla sweater, which I have used pretty often since I finished it.

Looking at the year as a designer, it has also been pretty good – even though a new job and a pregnancy sapped a lot of energy (and lately the wee baby girl has stolen my time in the most charming way) I have managed to self-publish 5 designs – had a design on the cover of a magazine – and also managed 4 designs for Filcolana. 

You really blew me away with the reception of Pearl Sisters and Eiri Baby, and I can see that you still all love the Six’es blanket (one of my older patterns and an exceptionally good scrap yarn project).

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Og så var der jo lige den Kickstarter – er stadig vildt glad for, at det lykkedes, og at min bog nu kommer på engelsk! Det var en ret god måde at slutte 2018 på.

Jeg har nu flere planer end den engelske bog – heldigvis – mange af dem omhandler nye designs og spændende samarbejder, men det må vente til en anden post.

Tak for 2018 og for jeres støtte til mig og mine designs, strikketanker og almindelige skriverier.

And then I can’t forget about the Kickstarter – I am still beyond happy that it got funded, and that my book now will be published in English. It was a pretty good way to end the year.

I have more plans than the English book – a lot of them are related to new designs and exiting co-operations, but all of those will have to wait to the next post.

Thank you for 2018 for your support both of me and my designs, knitting thoughts and everyday writings.

Der er kommet en ny boss herhjemme. En lille og sød en, men en uden meget tålmodighed, hvis mad- eller tryghedsleverancerne lader vente på sig.

Ikke at jeg har noget mod at levere.

Jeg er utrolig lettet og lykkelig. Jeg havde mange tanker og bekymringer i løbet af graviditeten – noget jeg overvejer at dele mere om senere, for det er vigtigt at normalisere – men indtil videre er bekymringerne blevet gjort til skamme, da frk. AM (blognavn efter, hvornår hun ankom til den ydre verden) er nem og skøn og god ved sin mor.

Måske bliver det også koldt nok til at proppe hende i strik på et tidspunkt, men det er ikke kommet endnu…

We have a new boss in the house. A wee and lovely one, but one without much patience when food or cuddles don’t appear immediately.

Not that I mind keeping her satisfied.

I am utterly happy and relieved. I had a lot of anxiety and thoughts and worries during the pregnancy – something that I’m planning to write more about since I think it’s important to talk about and normalise – but so far the worries have been groundless, as miss AM (her blog name is from her arrival time in the outer world) is a happy and easy and wonderful baby, who’s good to her mother.

Perhaps it will also be cool enough to put some knitwear on her at some time, but the time is definetely not yet here…

I’m twittering

Find me on Ravelry as Lykkefanten

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